Mid Life CrisisOctober 5, 2012
It’s the last day of a very long week. I’m so tired, I feel like my tissues are melting right off my bones.
I was telling a friend today that I wished hard work – my kind of hard work – burned calories. Then I could really work my ass off.
Drove Emma* to a voice lesson tonight, and we were chatting. She told me that she was thinking about the fact that between school, crew and homework, her days are often longer than mine. I told her that I was not minimizing the work or stress or commitment of doing a sport (i.e., a coach to answer to, no flexibility to skip without consequences), but I really wished exercise was built into my day like that. She actually understood.
Then I had her fill out a check for me to sign, to pay her voice teacher, and she told me a funny story about when she was in Manhattan this summer – with my credit card – and people would be thrown off when one of the many checks would come back from the split bill with MY name on it. ”Who is Suz?” they’d ask. ”Oh, that’s, um, me!” she would respond.
I said to her, “you know, it wouldn’t be so bad, being me. I have a good life.” I told her I like my job, my husband, my kids. She said, “wouldn’t it be funny if you woke up on the day after your birthday and you changed your mind? INSTANT mid-life crisis.”
Then I puzzled through that for a minute (out loud) … I had my kids on the younger side, they’re getting older while I’m still young – I’ll have an empty nest at the age of 44!!! Does that mean mid-life crisis comes sooner? hits harder?
Her take was this: mid-life crisis happens when people look at their lives when they hit 40 or 50 or whatever, and they think, “crap! I didn’t do anything I wanted to do!” ”But you, you’ve done everything you wanted to do.”
I liked that. I like thinking that’s what I’ve shown her. That she looks at her mom and she thinks “she’s happy; she did want she wanted to do.”
Including – in largest of parts – raised [almost] daughters that I can have fun conversations with, and who sit in the dark in the car even though they’re 3 minutes late for their lesson to finish a conversation.
*Yeah, I know.