My Mother’s Day Wishlist

May 6, 2011

For Mother’s Day this year, I am requesting one thing.  I want it not only for myself, but to benefit others.

I’m asking for Patience.

I need patience.  Because my parents are coming to town.

Lemon is in a race tomorrow, and Mouse is playing soccer.  Mother’s Day is on Sunday, and my parents hadn’t been here for a while.  So it seemed to make sense.

But a couple of weeks ago, I had a super-brief visit with my parents on my way home from the Middle of the Country, and my mom was … off.  A little too eager, a little too talkative; almost manic.  Then she went on this strange tirade yelling at me about something that happened a long, long, long time ago, as if it happened, well, right that moment.

If she’s that way all weekend, I’m going to struggle.

When my Mom was “acting up” (for lack of a better term), my father was making “sorry” faces at me.

But then today, my dad called me.  I was on my way back to the office after a necessary but inconvenient trip to a courthouse in a suburban county, and I’d gotten several emails while on the trip from partners wanting me in their office right now, which I obviously could not do, because I was in suburbia.  I wasn’t thrilled about going back to the office at 4 p.m., but I was thrilled that my darling husband drove me back, instead of me taking a cab (which I would have had to wait for) or the train (which I would have had to wait for).

My dad was calling to see if I could “just stop somewhere on my way home tonight and pick up a nice plant” for him to give my mother for mother’s day.

Uh, no, dad, I cannot “just stop somewhere” tonight.  First of all, I odn’t have a “somewhere” to stop.  I live in an urban center.  I don’t have florists peppering my path.  I get off the train in a residential neighborhood, again, no florists.  I am spending my evening washing and drying towels, in addition to driving kids all over the place – crew team dinner, soccer practice, etc.

I wasn’t kind in my rebuff.  I was testy.  I’m sure he knew I was irked.  But he still wouldn’t let me off the phone.  So I got more irked.  And more testy.

I want to not be irked or testy this weekend.  I want to be a loving, respectful daughter.  I want to say, instead, “Gee, dad, I’m sorry.  My time is totally full this evening, and I just don’t think I’ll be able to do that.”  In a gentle tone.  A loving tone.  Not a “What is your fucking problem?” tone.

That is my wish.

For Mother’s Day, I want the patience to be a good daughter.



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